No Menty B's here today.

It was silly of me to think life gets calmer as you plod along. It doesn’t. If anything, the more content I become with myself and my life, the more things pop up that completely shift me again. It’s like I’m some kind of experiment in this lifetime. I’m actually all for it, because as much as I sometimes say I’d love a beige, pop to Next on a Sunday kind of life, I absolutely do not. It would never suit me.

So this week, after finding another five four leaf clovers, genuinely true, I’ve had two life changing things land right in front of me. One could be really good, one could be the complete opposite. I’m keeping both off the blog for now while I work out how I’m going to handle them.

But here’s the thing. I haven’t spiralled. That’s new. There was a time where this kind of week would have sent me into overthinking, drinking, or a full blown menty B, but that reaction just isn’t there anymore. I’m still me, still fun, still finding the humour in things, but I’m genuinely shocked at how my nervous system handles things now. It’s calmer, more grounded, less reactive. I even caught myself almost reaching out to the wrong person when the good thing happened, that old pattern flickered for a second, then it passed.

Friends are shifting again too, and this is something that up until my 50s I always thought was a me problem, when in fact we have people in and out of our lives at different times and that’s ok. We don’t need to hang on to friendships for the sake of it, that’s where we burn ourselves out trying to see everyone. I can go months without seeing someone now and when we do meet up it’s like we’ve never been apart.

And that right there is proof we can rewire ourselves.

Same person

New chapter x